Food sucks, my blender rocks


I try and be happy, I try to stay upbeat, I try to look at the positive in life… but the truth is that I am SICK of being sick. It seems like no matter what I do, I can’t help but come down with some sort of bug every few weeks. At least it seems that way. And I can never tell whether it is just my normal stomach problems and prescription side effects or a violent stomach bug because most of the time they feel about the same. A good clue is if Craig is feeling a little bit unwell as well, then it is probably a bug. If he feels fine, blame the meds and my poor excuse for a digestive system.

I hate eating out. Most of the time, I hate eating period. I am not an anorexic; I just know what food does to me. However, eating is a terribly social thing and I love being social so I usually go along on work lunches and try to order the least damaging thing possible and then pick at it and take the rest home to Craig and fill up on triscuts when I get back to my desk. I love good food as much as the next person, but when you are on an acid-free, lactose-free, “hard to digest”-free diet then every new restaurant and new menu can be a pretty scary thing. Especially if I can’t go home and crawl in bed and assume the fetal position after attempting to drink two beers and eat Chinese.

If I could subsist on Cream of Wheat and Hershey’s bar every now and again I would be happy. I told Craig recently, and I mean it from the bottom of my heart, that I oftentimes wish they would devise a type of IV bag I could use at home on a consistent basis in lieu of having to digest actual food. Nutritious and balanced meals in a bag- a complete source of your daily recommended vitamins and minerals, pre-digested and guaranteed to cause no vomiting, acid reflux, gassiness, bloating, diarrhea, constipation or any other digestive problem one can think of. Oh, sign me up.

Along that line, the closest thing I have come up with to a daily meal in a bag is fruit smoothies. I LOVE fruit smoothies. About a month ago we dusted off our blender and fired it up. I am addicted. I wish I could take my blender to work and make fruit smoothies for lunch. I figure they are healthy, and nine times out of ten they actually settle. Care to make one for yourself? Our favorite is:

Some yogurt, one container
Some Lactaid milk (this is important-LACTAID milk)
Some frozen fruit
Some fresh fruit (this means a banana)
Some ice

We never measure but they come out good. For variety I will go with a peach theme, or a tropical fruit theme, but my favorite is strawberry banana. Then I just munch on some carrots, eat some bread and I am set.

So until they can transplant stomachs, or until they create meals in a bag, my Osterizer blender is my new best friend.


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