I would write something creative, but it is a Monday.
I could write something clever, but I’ve heard plagarizing is wrong.
I would post a poem, but I am no poet.
I could extol his virtues, but you all don’t want to read that- it would make you jealous of me.
I would write something sappy, but he’s not that kind of guy.
I could embarass him with a story, or poke fun of his (advanced) age, or post a crazy picture but I won’t, because I’ve heard what goes around comes around and one day I will be turning 30 too.
So, instead of any of that I’m just going to say:
Happy Birthday, Craig!
I think you’re pretty swell.